20 Comments

I’ve always known this was a Constantine review

Constantine

Plot

The theology of this film is bafflingly confusing, but nobody comes here for religious discussion. You come here to find out if a movie is any good…or, in some cases, to tell me I’m wrong.

Characters

Shia LaBeouf’s presence in this film wasn’t large enough to detract from Keanu Reeves and Rachel Weisz.

Visuals

This is one instance where the CGI is very nicely done.

Product Placement

I’m making a rare exception to my “I don’t count things in convenience stores”, because of the camera angles they used to make sure the Pepsi logo was in almost every shot during those scenes.

Rewatchability

I won’t be watching this again, but I’ve seen worse comic book based movies.

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20 comments on “I’ve always known this was a Constantine review

  1. I thought this was a pretty enjoyable movie, especially since I hadn’t read the comics because from what I’ve heard, they changed nearly everything about them. Keanu and Rachael Weisz are great, but Tilda Swinton and Peter Stormare are fantastic in their smaller roles.

  2. it’s based on a comic book? I actually liked this, despite Keanu Reeves’ short comings… but it really isn’t the kind of movie you want to watch all the time… but i do always like things that kind of have a religious angle… and things like this really make me wonder what’s in those extra books in the Catholic Bible… they have to be a real page turner… :D

    • Buy yourself an apocrypha and find out.

      • I had one for class… but sold it because well… i had to buy more books for class… plus right now I can barely keep up with the reading I’m required to do… thank God for sparknotes… but one day… one day… I’ll know… :D

        • Then you can tell me all about it

          • oh I’m sure I’ll have some post talking about my amazing discovery… lol…

          • You can teach us all about the Maccabees.

          • dude… looks like you should be the one teaching… i just took a religion class and I had to google to see what you’re talking about… lol… the thing is the one book i want to know about isn’t in the apocrypha… the Enoch… which is referred to by I believe Paul in the New Testament… and it sounds a bit trippy so I just want to know exactly what’s going on there… and why is it no one wants me to know about it… huh huh… total cray cray…

          • I just know about the Maccabees from my limited knowledge of the history of Hanukkah.

            Your comments are making me research haha

  3. I don’t remember Rachel Weisz here at all, but loved Tilda Swinton!

  4. Cool review yo. I’ve never fully watched this film purely because I’ve never had any proper interest in it, not only that but several of the people within my family and friend circle told me that the film wasn’t worth the time. Still debating it I guess haha.

  5. I don’t know about you guys, but whenever I see Keanu Reeves, I cringe.

  6. I think you can only like this movie if you aren’t familiar with the source material…and really, with all the changes, they should have just gone with a different name. If you’ve ever read the Running Man and then seen the movie – that’s the degree of difference we’re talking about.

    • I have no knowledge of Constantine outside of this movie, which I’ve seen once. I guess I was just judging it on its own merit.

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